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Manque – Nirav Khanal


Aug 31, 2018 | Story Blog | 0 comments

As I woke up today at 7:48 A.M. exact, I just had a dream reflecting such an uncharacteristic version of me. Such that, I gave an absolute beating to a boy, probably he did deserve it though. But as per my personality and ethical behaviour I had (or Presumed I had ) on mates, teachers, friends that they were absolutely shocked to see my demon version of me. I was just ruthless in my actions and beating, which only my younger brother knows (Sorry Bro, I apologize ).

As it happened, I had qualified for the 2013 intra – college Table Tennis Men’s Finals, so too had my younger brother’s classmate, in fact, he was his bench mate. That young guy was so desperate, he created a story upon himself just to disqualify me from the tournament to win the trophy. As I was a senior, I too had my other responsibilities to be done so I wasn’t able to be in the TT court watching others play, which meant I didn’t know whom I was playing in the Finals.

On the day of Finals, I was hanging out with my buddies. Then, I asked about the time of initiation of TT finals with a college helper just passing us by. I got to know it was scheduled for 10 A.M. When I checked my watch it was already 15 mins past 10. Me a senior guy, a student known by most of the teachers and somewhat known by most of the students as well, was the kind of feelings or say attitude I had upon myself. I also felt It won’t be a final without me and if it has to start I have to be called.

Slowly the attitude, ego of mine was fading away as time ticked by. I started to get nervous, wondered if I could see anyone calling me. Nope, none. So, I went up to the teacher by my self and asked about the TT Finals. I was shocked to hear what he said: “The TT Finals was going on”. Then I went straight up to the court and saw the match was going on. I asked the TT  Coordinator, what match was going on? He replied “The Finals”.I am supposed to play finals I exclaimed. I asked for the Finalist Name it said “Khanal vs Roshan”.I replied I’m Khanal, Don’t you know me? He did come up with a reasonable answer though, “I knew you’re Nirav Khanal but I couldn’t figure out if Khanal meant you.”Then, the coordinator called the players playing and then came up to me with a tie sheet. I was surprised yet again with what I saw in it. The word “Disqualified” next to my name. I asked what it was? and why it was? 

The coordinator came with a prescription of my name, such that the doctor prescribed me for bed rest and some drugs of influenza and fever. Thus, I won’t be able to compete. Every detail about me seemed correct birthdate, name, age probably it was because he was my brother’s classmate, rather bench mate. I was hallucinated and felt that it was true indeed. But what I saw little difference was the weight (as I’m true science student I would like to call it Mass ), 53 kg. I have been in and upwards of 55 kg always. Thus, I went up to that little guy in such a way that, he started confessing himself about the Fraud prescription, erasing my first name from the tie sheet and convincing the sub coordinator that prescription was handed to him by his bench mate in the behalf of his brother. So that little guy could face a weaker opponent in the Finals, which I faced in semi-finals.

Those words rushed my adrenaline and gave an absolute beating to the guy. First a tight slap then, a punch Knocking him to the ground and a kick as if I was taking a free kick in a football field. All the beating wasn’t intentional but agony, the frustration of being rubbed off of playing the final. Students and teachers were just looking at me and surprised to see such uncharacteristic behavior of mine.
Slowly I let go of my anger and gathered myself then picked that guy up, said sorry and asked him to apologize in front of all the spectators. I also reminded him to just focus on yourself. If you had used all your energy practicing TT rather then this nonsense you could have owned me. Also, I made my declaration that decision had been already made to disqualify rather forfeit me, it shouldn’t change. And play must continue. With those words, I was off the court. 

In Reality, I have never qualified for finals, Best result for me is the 3rd position, probably in class 9. Didn’t get to play in class 10. I had my best moments in TT in +2, but there weren’t any formal competition to be crowned of. But have played long after college ended until dark. So I have titled this as Manque ( is a person who has failed to live up to a specific expectation or ambition ). Those good old sweet memories. #Cheers 


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